My eyes reflect my guiless soul (or so im told at least one million times in a day).... all very flattering... for about 5 mins...
People look in my eyes and think aha.. shes soooooooo innocent.. unbelieveable ..lets just see what we can get away with...shes so dumb.. shell buy anything we sell her... at work its like " ok what sob story can we run today"
Dad wont take me shopping with him insisting the price goes up when i go along...most of my friends tell me Im easy to con.. read my previous blogs on my escapades with men and youll be forgiven for agreeing...
Cmon gimme a break? What is with us Indians and our oversmartassedness(ok i know thats not a word but u get my drift right?)
For the record:
a) I have a mother who gave me her eyes.. and trust me she can pull the wool over anyones at whim when she chooses too.So people get the hint...Im giving you the benefit of the doubt bcoz I chooose to.
b)The reason I hold the job I do is simple its called integrity....(enough said).
I've noticed lately that its almost a battle out there.... at work its a battle to prove who can work the least, crack the whip the most... and get away with it in the smartest fashion...
Us Indians are SO proud of the fact that we work ridiculous hours and through weekends...etc etc... er how much work is actually happening? Nope surfing the net , innumerable ciggie breaks and phone chats DONT COUNT.
Just how productive are we being really? How good a boss am I if I dont care about my teams overall development including Rest and Relaxation? And why should they give me or the organisation 100% if I dont show that much care or concern for their wellbeing?
Juniors are constantly critical of their bosses and are certain of the fact that they are smarter , better etc .. most management trainees today beleive they should be fasttracked in 6 months to CEO position...
Er.. guess who gave them that idea? We did...I dont think there is an organisation out there in this country at least which hasnt paid the price for over fastracking and thereby ensuring business heads with zero maturity...guess who pays the price?
Ive often wondered is it bcoz we were have nots who have suddenly been given a glimpse into the way the other half lives?
If someone is starving you can hardly blame them for snatching/stealing food..
Or is there more to this... something intrinsically woven into our DNA ? I've often heard that certain communities in India are lazy...some crazy and most of the others over smart...
Whether its the govt... taking our money in taxes & scams quite adamant they are smarter than us and will never get found out.. (and they always but always do...)
or its a political party .... conning people with religion....builders scamming with carpet area...super built up etc or its a man on the street selling fake anythings..
right down to the lil ole beggar lady who I've made friends with and who on a weekly basis insists her son is ill and she needs money for his medication...
Really do I look that dumb?
There are two points Im trying to make here:
1) Culturally is this inherent in our nature? If so why?
2) Despite being fully aware both personally and professionallly (hello I havent been asleep these last 36 years), I still choose to give people the benefit of the doubt.
Yup in my book your innocent until proven guilty.....BCOZ I CHOOSE TO BE THAT WAY.DEAL WITH IT.IM NOT DUMB IM NOT GULLIBLE... I simply try and treat people the way I wish to be treated.. and guess what else? For me there always will be a rainbow... I will always believe in a better tomorrow and plan to work towards it.Yes I believe in Miracles coz Ive seen them happen.......
Saturday, October 4, 2008
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
Of Mice and Men...we r like this only...
This is too all you women out there... all you Indian women to be more precise..
The other day an extremely well placed(professional) buddy of mine shared an interesting reality. He said the largest no. of employees who were dismissed from overseas projects were men and the grounds for the same were sexual harassment.
He said his organisation was now creating tailor made "awareness" workshops to enlighten the poor souls as to what was acceptable behaviour and what to avoid..
The recent press coverage on airline crew being subjected to sexual harassment by aseemingly sucessful upright citizen barely raised eyebrows..
Being an ex flight attendant and now a fairly established professional in the corporate world I'd like to add my perspective..
Ladies this is a monster we have created... our Ladla betas go out into the world viewing it as their oyster and if a woman is attractive she has no place in the workplace except as a pleasant diversion...
Dont believe me? Lets talk about how difficult an ex flight attendant finds it to find a place in the corporate world... leave aside qualifications and capabilities?
But I digress (theres room for a whole seperate blog on that one) lets talk intstead about senior male employees in my current and last organistions.
One supposedly responsible capable financial controller who could only talk to a womans chest... had the temerity to approach me in broad daylight on numerous occasions and in front of his team asked me why i wasnt married...
my response to this after several moments of shock was to simply tell him to find me a man who deserved me.
Clearly undaunted he then asked me what was written on my tshirt and said he didnt want to read since I could accuse him of looking at my boobs!!!!!
Not being a shrinking violet when I took it up with the toddler on a tricylce (also unfortunately my boss) his response was a burst of disbelieving laughter and then "did you slap him?"
I know what your thinking I should've slapped both of them.. with legal notices... alas as a nation we are not quite there...
Ladies this is a global media network I'm talking about...
In another job in another time.. I was on business travel and under instruction to bond with my regional business heads , to my mind that meant dinner and a drink, to his another.. I'll spare you the gory details.. all I'll say is Indore is a pretty scary place to be if your a woman on her own at night...only my mind saved my honour... had I been a little younger I shudder to think of the consequences..
My then bosses first reaction: to burst into disbeliving laughter
and then "Why did you go have a drink with him in the first place?" Fortunately for me the accused, when probed burst into sobs and admitted all his crimes...
My md asked if i could find it in my heart to forgive him and allow him to keep his job... since he had a new born child.. I did just that...
Why am I writing this now? Because Im alarmed at the double standards... for every Indra Nyooi and Sonia Gandhi we have sickos who truly believes that divorcees are desperate women asking for it...
Trust me I have travelled and lived all over the world and have recieved far more respect from Arabs than I have from Indian men. I've been back in this country 5 years I chose to come back and take the good with the bad... but I have to say I'm astounded with the double standards and predjudice...I have witnessed and been subjected to.
If I try to take an objective stance (it's tough since I'm mstly so passionate about stuff) I'd say I dont hate men...far from it I have more male than female friends but I simply cannot understand the almost fatalistic explanations/warnings I get "Indian men are like this wonlllllllllly!"
Er NO! Whats the point of an education? of a career? of society evolving?
Its fair to say that I have had a far more liberal & cosmopolitan upbringing since I come from a mixed race family... however I' still very Indian and Im struggling with this whole : my mother/ daughter/ sisters are saints to be worshipped and protected (at intervals you understand?) its those other women who dont belong to my skin colour/ race/ religion/ beliefs who are easy targets....
Moms, sisters, daughters listen up...have you not played a contributing role raising your eyebrows at your sons girlfriends/ wives? particularly if they are not of your race/ religion/ economic or social background?
Are you judging her because shes dresses inappropriately (differently from you? Speaks inappropriately (differently from you?) etc etc..
Aren'tyou forgetting she is still a woman?
You want to preserve your culture you say? Then stick to saas bahu serials... why are you educating your children further? phoren trips? stop em at once! As for phoren education... good grief women what are you thinking?
Is that western make up you wear? jewellery? bags? shoes? clothes? What is that a cosmo in your hand? (the magazine, the drink in public is a no no I know)..what you want to run the family business? No you cant its against our beliefs/ traditions..
If you cant take the heat sister stay out of the kitchen...
The other day an extremely well placed(professional) buddy of mine shared an interesting reality. He said the largest no. of employees who were dismissed from overseas projects were men and the grounds for the same were sexual harassment.
He said his organisation was now creating tailor made "awareness" workshops to enlighten the poor souls as to what was acceptable behaviour and what to avoid..
The recent press coverage on airline crew being subjected to sexual harassment by aseemingly sucessful upright citizen barely raised eyebrows..
Being an ex flight attendant and now a fairly established professional in the corporate world I'd like to add my perspective..
Ladies this is a monster we have created... our Ladla betas go out into the world viewing it as their oyster and if a woman is attractive she has no place in the workplace except as a pleasant diversion...
Dont believe me? Lets talk about how difficult an ex flight attendant finds it to find a place in the corporate world... leave aside qualifications and capabilities?
But I digress (theres room for a whole seperate blog on that one) lets talk intstead about senior male employees in my current and last organistions.
One supposedly responsible capable financial controller who could only talk to a womans chest... had the temerity to approach me in broad daylight on numerous occasions and in front of his team asked me why i wasnt married...
my response to this after several moments of shock was to simply tell him to find me a man who deserved me.
Clearly undaunted he then asked me what was written on my tshirt and said he didnt want to read since I could accuse him of looking at my boobs!!!!!
Not being a shrinking violet when I took it up with the toddler on a tricylce (also unfortunately my boss) his response was a burst of disbelieving laughter and then "did you slap him?"
I know what your thinking I should've slapped both of them.. with legal notices... alas as a nation we are not quite there...
Ladies this is a global media network I'm talking about...
In another job in another time.. I was on business travel and under instruction to bond with my regional business heads , to my mind that meant dinner and a drink, to his another.. I'll spare you the gory details.. all I'll say is Indore is a pretty scary place to be if your a woman on her own at night...only my mind saved my honour... had I been a little younger I shudder to think of the consequences..
My then bosses first reaction: to burst into disbeliving laughter
and then "Why did you go have a drink with him in the first place?" Fortunately for me the accused, when probed burst into sobs and admitted all his crimes...
My md asked if i could find it in my heart to forgive him and allow him to keep his job... since he had a new born child.. I did just that...
Why am I writing this now? Because Im alarmed at the double standards... for every Indra Nyooi and Sonia Gandhi we have sickos who truly believes that divorcees are desperate women asking for it...
Trust me I have travelled and lived all over the world and have recieved far more respect from Arabs than I have from Indian men. I've been back in this country 5 years I chose to come back and take the good with the bad... but I have to say I'm astounded with the double standards and predjudice...I have witnessed and been subjected to.
If I try to take an objective stance (it's tough since I'm mstly so passionate about stuff) I'd say I dont hate men...far from it I have more male than female friends but I simply cannot understand the almost fatalistic explanations/warnings I get "Indian men are like this wonlllllllllly!"
Er NO! Whats the point of an education? of a career? of society evolving?
Its fair to say that I have had a far more liberal & cosmopolitan upbringing since I come from a mixed race family... however I' still very Indian and Im struggling with this whole : my mother/ daughter/ sisters are saints to be worshipped and protected (at intervals you understand?) its those other women who dont belong to my skin colour/ race/ religion/ beliefs who are easy targets....
Moms, sisters, daughters listen up...have you not played a contributing role raising your eyebrows at your sons girlfriends/ wives? particularly if they are not of your race/ religion/ economic or social background?
Are you judging her because shes dresses inappropriately (differently from you? Speaks inappropriately (differently from you?) etc etc..
Aren'tyou forgetting she is still a woman?
You want to preserve your culture you say? Then stick to saas bahu serials... why are you educating your children further? phoren trips? stop em at once! As for phoren education... good grief women what are you thinking?
Is that western make up you wear? jewellery? bags? shoes? clothes? What is that a cosmo in your hand? (the magazine, the drink in public is a no no I know)..what you want to run the family business? No you cant its against our beliefs/ traditions..
If you cant take the heat sister stay out of the kitchen...
Monday, May 26, 2008
If I do say so myself
Lately certain things have been bothering me...The voices in my head are growing louder, I'm afraid they wont shut up... need to talk this through... would appreciate your opinion / thoughts heck even your criticism (nervous look).
Where's the line....... which side of it do you take ? Do you have a stand? Is there a method to the grey and cream madness?
When it comes to ethics and integrity, principles and morality are they just words in a vision statement... Can we stand up for what we believe in?
Why do I see plastic everywhere.. plastic on magazine covers... foreign publication houses the best in the world... supposedly eco friendly... eco aware.. responsible socially & morally upright beacons of the civilised world?
Conde Naste? Harper Collins are you listening? Your Uk & Us mags scream from the top of the stands eco friendly eco friendly...is India so remote and inacessably third world that you wont accept responsibility but will lap up the revenue every sale of your exhorbitantly priced desi versions yield?
Marie Claire for eg is one of the international publications I've long since adored, purely because of its content... the latest British issue is dedicated solely to eco concerns, ethical awareness blah blah...imagine my disgust when I find the Indian version wrapped in alarming amounts of plastic month after month..
Same story with the Cosmopolitans, Vogues etc.
As for us locals ? The UB group ? World Wide Media (and other erstwhile jumpers on bandwagons) What gives? As an avid bibliophile and a loyal consumer I'd just like to rant :IM APPALLED!
How on Gods green earth can this be happening...how can you devote reams and reams of content to saving the environment lectures and then go right ahead and actively encourage pollution? And how the hell ( in a much smaller voice now... am Ibuying into this? regularly month after month? As you can see the little voice got too much for me)
Hello people? I missing something here?
Mr. Bush when you point the finger of blame in our direction hows about taking a lil ole southern responsibility too?
What about all these mega fashion brands mushrooming all over the town before you can say Choo (sic!)... Do you see more plastic packaging? In fact ive seen more hope (if i look closely enough I usually can spot a ray or two) in the supermarkets in Pune where people simply refuse to use plastic.. Supermarket whizzes are you listening?
People what about the planet? what about the next generation? You know all you responsible parents out there striving to ensure junior gets admission into the best school? News flash they mightnt be a planet for his kids/ grandkids if we continue the way we are?
If this sounds like an impassionate rant it is... gimme ur views now, gimme hope or gimme answers but do something like right now!
Where's the line....... which side of it do you take ? Do you have a stand? Is there a method to the grey and cream madness?
When it comes to ethics and integrity, principles and morality are they just words in a vision statement... Can we stand up for what we believe in?
Why do I see plastic everywhere.. plastic on magazine covers... foreign publication houses the best in the world... supposedly eco friendly... eco aware.. responsible socially & morally upright beacons of the civilised world?
Conde Naste? Harper Collins are you listening? Your Uk & Us mags scream from the top of the stands eco friendly eco friendly...is India so remote and inacessably third world that you wont accept responsibility but will lap up the revenue every sale of your exhorbitantly priced desi versions yield?
Marie Claire for eg is one of the international publications I've long since adored, purely because of its content... the latest British issue is dedicated solely to eco concerns, ethical awareness blah blah...imagine my disgust when I find the Indian version wrapped in alarming amounts of plastic month after month..
Same story with the Cosmopolitans, Vogues etc.
As for us locals ? The UB group ? World Wide Media (and other erstwhile jumpers on bandwagons) What gives? As an avid bibliophile and a loyal consumer I'd just like to rant :IM APPALLED!
How on Gods green earth can this be happening...how can you devote reams and reams of content to saving the environment lectures and then go right ahead and actively encourage pollution? And how the hell ( in a much smaller voice now... am Ibuying into this? regularly month after month? As you can see the little voice got too much for me)
Hello people? I missing something here?
Mr. Bush when you point the finger of blame in our direction hows about taking a lil ole southern responsibility too?
What about all these mega fashion brands mushrooming all over the town before you can say Choo (sic!)... Do you see more plastic packaging? In fact ive seen more hope (if i look closely enough I usually can spot a ray or two) in the supermarkets in Pune where people simply refuse to use plastic.. Supermarket whizzes are you listening?
People what about the planet? what about the next generation? You know all you responsible parents out there striving to ensure junior gets admission into the best school? News flash they mightnt be a planet for his kids/ grandkids if we continue the way we are?
If this sounds like an impassionate rant it is... gimme ur views now, gimme hope or gimme answers but do something like right now!
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